I believe that forgiveness is essential to our happiness.
The unforgiving mind becomes a dark place that harbors resentments and discontent.
I believe that on a regular basis, we should examine each situation that has brought us pain, each person and each interaction we have ever had that still carries any charge in us, and then we need to do the inner healing necessary to release all the blocked energy in us.
I regularly search my mind for anything that might indicate that there is still some resentment or un-forgiveness in me, towards anyone or anything.
For the most part, I find that I am successful at releasing the situation that caused me pain, and seeing the person who supposedly “caused” it in a forgiving light.
That person did not know better, and I was just as wrong as they were.
Over the years, I have developed many ways of releasing energy that has been blocked due to past situations.
I reason with myself, explain to myself the situation from a higher point of view, sit in meditation with a willingness to see nothing but the Light in that situation and in that person, and I often use visualization as a technique to release energetic blocks.
I may visualize myself in a beautiful place sitting with the person, and I would converse with them, asking them to show me the Light and to bring forgiveness and blessings to us both….
In many situations, I end up this inner visualization with a good technique that I learned many years ago.
I call it “Washing our hearts in the river of light.”
You see…. We often hold resentments in our hearts.
These resentments could lead to a closed heart, which could lead to physical heart attacks….
We narrow down the channels of energy to our hearts, and so we block the flow of energy and love.
We first do it mentally, and later it manifest into the physical in the form of sickness.
So this technique of practicing forgiveness includes visualizing the light in the person and the interaction, asking for help and release from our higher guides, and the final step is visualizing going to the shores of the river of Light and Love…
It can be anything your own imagination can conjure up…
For me, it is a vast river of sweet water, that is bathing in a pure golden light.
I stand by the shores of this imaginary river, and I take my heart out of my chest.
I take it and wash it in the pure cleansing water.
I always notice that there are bits of sharp items in it… And that at first it feels stiff…
As I continue to squeeze and wash, it becomes as soft as a sponge… It becomes pure, clean and flexible.
If I feel many sharp or hard items in my heart as I am washing it, I often ask what they represent…
Intuitively a name or a situation that still needs forgiveness comes to me.
And even as it comes, it dissolves with my willingness to forgive and to let go…
So this is what I do to energetically release all past mistakes, unpleasant interactions and pain.
Some people in workshops that I used to attend, told me that all they could do was to arrive at the shores of the river of Love and Light, and to sit there saying: “I am WILLING to forgive… I am willing to let all the pain go…”
Some people said that that was as far as they could honestly go, since the pain and injustice felt too overwhelming to them.
I believe that you do not really forgive injustices, you forgive ILLUSIONS… wrong translations, limited perceptions, and of course, your own karmic ties.
When I feel that I hold no more resentments of any kind towards anyone, I test myself and ask myself, can I go a step further and actually LOVE that person again.
The answer must be YES.
But my ego is tricky…
It tells me that IF I have REALLY forgiven that person, he or she would be my close friend again…
I reflected about this a lot, and I do think that this is a misconception.
Forgiveness can be fully accomplished, but the relationship may have already run its course.
Relationships do not have to be forever to be successful, and to have served a purpose for awhile.
Longevity is NOT an indication of successful relationships, and healing does not mean that you have to re-establish all the old friendships that we had previously cut off because of grievances.
In fact, you could do this healing and forgiveness with a family member, a friend, or an ex-husband who has already passed away.
Reestablishing a close relationship, even if the other person is willing, is NOT necessary to full forgiveness.
All that is required is to feel free, a lightness of heart, when you think of them, to feel grace and love, to have some insights into the events and to honestly wish them a world of Love and Light and a million blessings.
These are the kind of thoughts I had today, as I spent the day staining our decks and enjoying the sunny Hokianga weather.
We are almost coming to the end of our stay here in NZ… Just a couple more days of work and packing….
I have enjoyed my time here very much… in our own Zen retreat on the green hills in front of the vast harbor.
I feel restful, despite the huge amount of hard work, clearing and gardening that we did during this visit.
I still took much time to paint in the studio, to watch the stars in the sky, the light and the clouds as they cast shadows on the harbor….
Wishing you a wonderful night or day, in whatever part of the world you are in now…