Enlightenment – my personal story
There is a very good book by Jack Kornfield, titled: “After the enlightenment, the laundry.”
In this book, Jack shares stories of many masters and spiritual teachers, who describe their lives after their enlightenment occurred.
Despite common misbeliefs and skepticism, enlightenment is not as rare as you may think.
It happens to many more people than you would think, who devoted their hearts, minds and time to exploring the nature of reality.
I am writing this piece for my own reasons, to share what I experienced in my own life.
About a year a half ago, I experienced enlightenment.
I have been a spiritual student for most of my life.
I had experienced many “Aha!” moments, in which things get clarified in your mind, and suddenly abstract concepts make perfect sense.
These “Aha” moments are wonderful and they leave you high with happiness, but they are not enlightenment.
When I experienced what I can only call Enlightenment for lack of a better word, it was much more than a thousand Aha! moments put together.
During this period, which lasted for a few weeks, I experienced a major transformation, and my whole life’s movie rolled before me, with every piece of the puzzle fitting perfectly into the bigger picture.
I saw how perfect it all was… And IS….
How nothing was at random and how every person, every event, and even what seems like insignificant encounters and minute details, perfectly fitted into the greater good.
I went through a major opening of the heart and mind, that left me in awe…
I felt tremendous love to so many people… In fact, to everyone.
Love and appreciation to all beings, filled my heart to overflowing.
At times, when I looked at the beauty of it all, I had tears of regret running through my eyes…I just could not believe that I had been so ignorant,…. When all along so much love, so much help, so much gentleness was, and still is, all around us….
How was I so blind, and asked for so little from Life, when so much was offered to me, with so much love…..
I saw this light, this beauty in the faces of everyone I came into contact with…. And I do mean EVERYONE…. No one was without it…. Yet they were not aware of their awesomeness and beauty….
The tears were not there for long.
When they dried up, untold happiness entered my heart and I just could not stop smiling for months afterwards.
I was happy beyond measure and beyond what I had ever experienced before…. Even though nothing external brought it about… I did not win the lottery, nor won a major award….. It was all coming from within….
For the first time, I was seeing into Life….
I realized that one of the reasons that people rarely find God, is because God is so much a part of us, that we are looking for some abstract concept of external power in the sky…
God is in each and every one of us…
During that period, I got to see and experience that…
In fact, in our very essence, we are smaller gods.
Creators and powerful spiritual beings.
It felt as if a shell had cracked open inside me, and my true being finally got to breathe and to live.
It felt as if a ‘new’ me, beyond my self doubts, ideas, roles and concepts that I had of who I was, is finally here and out and in the open….
I was no longer a wife, a woman, a daughter, a sister, a citizen of any country…. I was a free being…. Totally free…
I was also so sensitive, and tactile during this period.
Sex was fabulous and food tasted so much better….the smell of flowers in my garden in New Zealand, was intoxicating…. It was making me drunk with happiness….
I had physical sensations in which I sensed the illusions of karma, of being at one with so many beings…. I had been and identified as one with many mothers, many fathers, many souls…. I could see and feel all the dramas of the human plight…. Of believing you are living in bodies…. And I let go of it all of it and saw beyond the dreams….
After these short weeks passed, this sense of pulling up…
This inner Voice that explained things to me with so much humor, so much love, with such insight and depth of perspective….. Started to fade away…
It was still there, but instead of being an odd and fabulous experience, it had integrated into my own being, and the oddness of it was replaced with deep conviction.
If I sound sometimes in my writing, as if I am fully convinced of my statements, it is because I AM….
I have seen it…….
I was truly given a not so rare experience of enlightenment…. And it has changed me forever and beyond any doubts.
In the book “After the enlightenment, the laundry”, Kornfield shared many stories in which spiritual teachers described how difficult it was for them to deal with the world and with challenges that came to them, after enlightenment.
How do you deal with people who had not experienced the same……. Who are less open than you are now….
Sometimes those teachers experienced severe setbacks…..sickness, financial collapse, family demands…. Divorces…. Many uncertainties….
I realized that enlightenment is NOT a destination, nor the end of the journey, if you care to call it a journey.
It is also NOT a reward for a well lived spiritual life…
But enlightenment did solidify inside me, all of the concepts that up until then, I had accepted on faith alone.
Enlightenment comes in layers… It is a process of realizations of greater and greater truths.
The possibilities and layers of reality are HUGE… And our potential to tap into them and enjoy them, is endless.
Yes, Enlightenment will change your life, but beyond it, there are cycles of truths to explore…. greater and greater aspects of the perfection of Life, will unfold and make perfect sense….. You will grasp deeply what Life beyond illusions truly means…
I know it is happening to me now…
I am living and putting it all into practice…
I am sharing it with whomever I come in contact with and is willing to listen…. Otherwise, I keep it to myself…
Do I miss the sensation of intensely being so open of heart and mind? So at awe at the beauty of it all and our integral part in it?
Sure I do….
But I know that clinging to past experiences is not wise.
I have to move on to greater adventures in realization which are to come….
I know I am moving towards Bliss… And Grace untold…. And I am ready!