I visited the Greek Islands many times.
But only once, I traveled there with one of my girlfriends.
Both of us were recently divorced and in need of a change of scenery.
On the island of Crete, we booked a hotel room on the edge of the blue sea.
It had an impressive Greek island architecture with little round balconies on which we sunbathed and looked over the rocky beach below.
There were great looking Greek men to admire…. And even better looking girls from Finland and Sweden, on holiday to taste the magic of the Greek islands…..
One sunny day, I sat on the balcony and looked over the sea.
It was lunch time, and I’ve already downed some cold beers….
Through my sunglasses, I mentioned to my girlfriend, that the speedboat in the distant, towing the inner tube at high speed, looked like SO MUCH FUN…
After all, the people being towed were screaming for joy….
I suggested we try it….
We put on our skimpy bikinis and went down to the beach. (we were young and pretty…single and ready to mingle…)
I asked the boat owner how much it cost and he gave me a quote for twenty minutes or for forty minutes.
I chose the forty minutes to double the fun….
My girlfriend said she will go next, after me.
It was a windy day, and the boat was rocking on the waves.
I swam over to the tube and sat myself comfortably in it…. Adjusting my new expensive sunglasses to make sure they will stay on my nose…..
I gave the driver the thumbs up… I was ready….
Almost immediately after he started zooming in high speed, the tube was flailing in the air and I was holding for dear life to stay sited on it.
The first flying into the air and landing back on the ocean, felt sooooooo painful…
To be honest, it felt MORE than painful.
It felt like someone was taking a baseball bat, and slamming it into my butt and lower back.
I had tears in my eyes from the pain.
The second time I flew high and my butt hit the surface of the sea, I lost my sunglasses…. Never to be found again…
With all the engine noise, the boat owner could not hear me screaming….
I was screaming “Stop! Please stop…..”
He turned back to me raised his thumb up….took a puff from his cigarette and said in broken English: “What You Say? Fast? You say Fast? Ok… I go faster”
I was crying: “Not fast! S- T -O -P……”
But it was too late… His increased speed made each landing even MORE painful…. I felt my teeth shake each time my butt slammed into the sea.
As it turned out, the people who took the ride before me, were NOT screaming for joy…
They were screaming from pain….
Suffice it to say that I could not walk for a few days after this…. Nor get laid… Which was part of the plan in going to Greece.
Instead, I drunk plenty of Ouzo and ate grilled jumbo shrimps…..